








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 208 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 222 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2028 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,519 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2084 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2541 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2080 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1814 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $563,401 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 229 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lengoku | 45% | 56 |
| #2 | si^b^rO | 43% | 21 |
| #3 | Griezz | 41% | 70 |
| #4 | YaBoiPappy | 29% | 31 |
| #5 | Shwayy | 28% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lengoku | 45% | 56 |
| #2 | si^b^rO | 43% | 21 |
| #3 | Griezz | 41% | 70 |
| #4 | YaBoiPappy | 29% | 31 |
| #5 | Shwayy | 28% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Griezz | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Shwayy | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | si^b^rO | 2 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | Lengoku | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shwayy | 356 | 0.31 | 9 min |
| #2 | Lengoku | 123 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | Griezz | 93 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | si^b^rO | 36 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | YaBoiPappy | 26 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Griezz | +0.36 | 74 | 54 |
| #2 | Lengoku | +0.28 | 80 | 55 |
| #3 | si^b^rO | -0.13 | 76 | 64 |
| #4 | YaBoiPappy | -0.31 | 69 | 39 |
| #5 | Shwayy | -0.56 | 68 | 63 |





