








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 910 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 487 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 71 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5838 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,979 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6130 | 24% |
| Smokes | 7523 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 5177 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 7149 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,275,645 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 317 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Butler | 62% | 39 |
| #2 | MzWw^ | 59% | 75 |
| #3 | ChrisTurner | 58% | 55 |
| #4 | Totoro4346#8299 | 58% | 45 |
| #5 | d0n_Spurgt | 57% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TIKTOK_TEIS | 491 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #2 | MgN0xX | 377 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #3 | sVaMpeh4t | 361 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #4 | orga- | 299 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #5 | Butler | 279 | 0.31 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sVaMpeh4t | +2.70 | 80 | 71 |
| #2 | MgN0xX | +2.26 | 81 | 60 |
| #3 | ChrisTurner | +1.65 | 78 | 58 |
| #4 | d0n_Spurgt | +1.63 | 79 | 72 |
| #5 | Nymann | +1.47 | 84 | 57 |





