








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 34 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
214 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,625 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1298 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1534 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 665 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 1128 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $78,656 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PinTas | 60% | 20 |
| #2 | ✪ Lé | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | sunSet | 56% | 25 |
| #4 | stickerzz | 51% | 49 |
| #5 | digao INSANE.GG | 50% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | javs | 40% | 10 |
| #12 | -Brnx | 36% | 33 |
| #13 | Eragonz | 22% | 9 |
| #14 | Anoob's | 20% | 5 |
| #15 | Subz1 ;* | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VAI CORINTHIA | 51 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #2 | FoX | 48 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #3 | stickerzz | 38 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #4 | gzera- | 26 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | -Brnx | 16 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stickerzz | +1.51 | 70 | 70 |
| #2 | ✪ Lé | +0.80 | 67 | 72 |
| #3 | -Brnx | +0.56 | 79 | 65 |
| #4 | gzera- | +0.27 | 83 | 66 |
| #5 | FoX | +0.14 | 61 | 72 |





