








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 113 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1311 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,359 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 788 | 23% |
| Smokes | 780 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1052 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 739 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $378,915 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 28 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IO | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | Annie | 50% | 8 |
| #3 | Callum | 50% | 30 |
| #4 | cheapgorilla | 49% | 47 |
| #5 | Yeoush | 45% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Sin | 40% | 47 |
| #9 | Palo | 35% | 17 |
| #10 | TeenBulma | 33% | 9 |
| #11 | Scruff | 31% | 16 |
| #12 | Lizzie4Lyf #RipMyQueen | 23% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mex | 7 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | Yeoush | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Callum | 4 | 0.0064 |
| #4 | IOExceptional | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | cheapgorilla | 2 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IOExceptional | 467 | 0.26 | 12 min |
| #2 | Mex | 82 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | Yeoush | 67 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #4 | cheapgorilla | 67 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | IO | 65 | 0.37 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cheapgorilla | +1.23 | 82 | 64 |
| #2 | Relo | +1.17 | 75 | 59 |
| #3 | IO | +0.95 | 73 | 74 |
| #4 | IOExceptional | -0.12 | 64 | 64 |
| #5 | Yeoush | -0.33 | 69 | 54 |





