








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 441 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 176 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 111 matches | ||
| Wingman | 40 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4298 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,070 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6340 | 32% |
| Smokes | 5830 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3597 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 4303 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $702,895 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 116 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IronDuD3 | 63% | 32 |
| #2 | kc | 59% | 107 |
| #3 | Kampfzwerg | 59% | 46 |
| #4 | TorNaD0. | 49% | 49 |
| #5 | pfar | 46% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | pfar | 46% | 50 |
| #6 | KC★ | 43% | 104 |
| #7 | kAKTUS# | 43% | 124 |
| #8 | Cubex | 38% | 26 |
| #9 | pvier | 38% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kAKTUS# | 16 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | kc | 6 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | KC★ | 4 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | pfar | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | Kampfzwerg | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kAKTUS# | 373 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| #2 | kc | 262 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #3 | pfar | 257 | 0.26 | 5 min |
| #4 | IronDuD3 | 185 | 0.28 | 5 min |
| #5 | KC★ | 176 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pvier | +3.15 | 92 | 64 |
| #2 | IronDuD3 | +2.33 | 39 | 67 |
| #3 | valnaR# | +0.78 | 68 | 67 |
| #4 | Cubex | +0.09 | 73 | 59 |
| #5 | kAKTUS# | -0.16 | 73 | 63 |





