








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 897 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 515 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6406 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,759 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5681 | 23% |
| Smokes | 6503 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 7989 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 4586 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,131,917 of utility $83 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 208 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | οτιcο | 53% | 74 |
| #2 | rx | 50% | 456 |
| #3 | Shroodle | 50% | 338 |
| #4 | ︻デ 一Awestun | 50% | 404 |
| #5 | ZK | 46% | 230 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | οτιcο | 53% | 74 |
| #2 | rx | 50% | 456 |
| #3 | Shroodle | 50% | 338 |
| #4 | ︻デ 一Awestun | 50% | 404 |
| #5 | ZK | 46% | 230 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shroodle | 17 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | rx | 16 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | ︻デ 一Awestun | 12 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | ZK | 10 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | οτιcο | 4 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rx | 990 | 0.10 | 22 min |
| #2 | ZK | 952 | 0.19 | 29 min |
| #3 | Shroodle | 894 | 0.12 | 20 min |
| #4 | ︻デ 一Awestun | 515 | 0.06 | 13 min |
| #5 | οτιcο | 205 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | οτιcο | +1.80 | 74 | 54 |
| #2 | astra | +1.43 | 70 | 67 |
| #3 | Shroodle | +0.96 | 79 | 72 |
| #4 | ZK | -0.57 | 66 | 58 |
| #5 | rx | -0.81 | 61 | 56 |





