








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 7 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 26 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
638 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,633 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 363 | 22% |
| Smokes | 479 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 482 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 309 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $180,286 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Julebryg_DK (The OG's and Kids) | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | hugogamerdk | 100% | 3 |
| #3 | Fury | 100% | 3 |
| #4 | alb3tr0s [DK] | 100% | 3 |
| #5 | Ghosty4k ヤン | 53% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Ghosty4k ヤン | 53% | 30 |
| #6 | .+*ben dover*+. | 52% | 29 |
| #7 | Arnie Linson | 50% | 4 |
| #8 | Fuck You Fucking Fuck | 50% | 24 |
| #9 | Wuush | 44% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ghosty4k ヤン | 6 | 0.0094 |
| #2 | Wuush | 6 | 0.0174 |
| #3 | Fuck You Fucking Fuck | 3 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | .+*ben dover*+. | 2 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ghosty4k ヤン | 84 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #2 | .+*ben dover*+. | 52 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | Wuush | 50 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | Fuck You Fucking Fuck | 48 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | Arnie Linson | 8 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fury | +4.68 | 87 | 66 |
| #2 | Arnie Linson | +2.41 | 26 | 67 |
| #3 | Wuush | +2.21 | 59 | 65 |
| #4 | alb3tr0s [DK] | +1.84 | 54 | 77 |
| #5 | Ghosty4k ヤン | +1.63 | 64 | 72 |





