








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 298 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 206 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2379 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,559 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1696 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1381 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2123 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1359 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $789,562 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 562 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frug | 108 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| #2 | WinnieTheJew | 99 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #3 | Femboy Fanatic | 54 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | Bruza | 51 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | Estrogenware >w< | 45 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frug | +3.54 | 85 | 62 |
| #2 | Spermino retardino | +3.54 | 100 | 64 |
| #3 | Konflex | +1.33 | 56 | 31 |
| #4 | Niggalas Cage | +1.31 | 76 | 60 |
| #5 | WinnieTheJew | +0.89 | 93 | 66 |





