








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 391 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 317 matches | ||
| Faceit | 146 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6127 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,238 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10264 | 33% |
| Smokes | 9290 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 5725 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 5959 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $618,067 of utility $55 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 524 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J Hus | 57% | 63 |
| #2 | Coulio | 53% | 180 |
| #3 | Constaant | 52% | 411 |
| #4 | Nemm Genesis | 51% | 401 |
| #5 | Ballen | 50% | 476 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Nemm Genesis | 51% | 401 |
| #5 | Ballen | 50% | 476 |
| #6 | SebbeXN | 49% | 261 |
| #7 | imex | 46% | 72 |
| #8 | Cabban | 33% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ballen | 20 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Constaant | 13 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Nemm Genesis | 8 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Coulio | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | J Hus | 3 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ballen | 1475 | 0.14 | 39 min |
| #2 | Constaant | 1152 | 0.13 | 35 min |
| #3 | SebbeXN | 489 | 0.09 | 14 min |
| #4 | Nemm Genesis | 444 | 0.05 | 9 min |
| #5 | J Hus | 234 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J Hus | +2.80 | 72 | 74 |
| #2 | Diggi | +2.56 | 74 | 82 |
| #3 | Cabban | +2.02 | 73 | 76 |
| #4 | Constaant | +1.10 | 58 | 69 |
| #5 | imex | -0.39 | 72 | 57 |





