








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1182 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 559 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 54 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4898 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,002 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2916 | 17% |
| Smokes | 5761 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 5258 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 3067 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,806,945 of utility $219 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 341 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sweatshirt / Haaalt Stop!. | 52% | 115 |
| #2 | Chrizzzo0 | 52% | 308 |
| #3 | Sturak™ | 52% | 66 |
| #4 | .#StiRvOo | 47% | 218 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sweatshirt / Haaalt Stop!. | 52% | 115 |
| #2 | Chrizzzo0 | 52% | 308 |
| #3 | Sturak™ | 52% | 66 |
| #4 | .#StiRvOo | 47% | 218 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chrizzzo0 | 10 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | Sweatshirt / Haaalt Stop!. | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | .#StiRvOo | 3 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | Sturak™ | 2 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chrizzzo0 | 680 | 0.10 | 17 min |
| #2 | .#StiRvOo | 431 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| #3 | Sweatshirt / Haaalt Stop!. | 116 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | Sturak™ | 45 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sturak™ | +2.74 | 53 | 54 |
| #2 | frafur | +0.25 | 37 | 57 |
| #3 | Chrizzzo0 | -0.61 | 60 | 77 |
| #4 | Sweatshirt / Haaalt Stop!. | -1.29 | 39 | 53 |
| #5 | .#StiRvOo | -1.73 | 33 | 75 |





