








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 158 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1528 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,782 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1787 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1303 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1148 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1544 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $387,490 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 109 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | allcaps | 64% | 11 |
| #2 | Code | 57% | 14 |
| #3 | TheDamøn | 54% | 80 |
| #4 | Synergy | 53% | 58 |
| #5 | Armory6 | 50% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | 🆃🆁🅸🅿 | 48% | 64 |
| #7 | Johnny | 48% | 96 |
| #8 | OAF | Zer0^ | 44% | 9 |
| #9 | Jbird | 42% | 95 |
| #10 | Mike Hunt™ | 29% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheDamøn | 12 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | Jbird | 8 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | 🆃🆁🅸🅿 | 7 | 0.0055 |
| #4 | Mike Hunt™ | 4 | 0.0101 |
| #5 | Code | 1 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Johnny | 418 | 0.22 | 10 min |
| #2 | TheDamøn | 170 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | Synergy | 116 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | Jbird | 100 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | 🆃🆁🅸🅿 | 100 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Synergy | +3.04 | 88 | 61 |
| #2 | Johnny | +2.94 | 77 | 67 |
| #3 | Armory6 | +2.15 | 83 | 60 |
| #4 | Code | +2.14 | 75 | 61 |
| #5 | TheDamøn | +2.12 | 61 | 50 |





