








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 317 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 130 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1893 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,861 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1988 | 34% |
| Smokes | 749 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 1344 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1780 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $724,125 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 226 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | boob | 48% | 50 |
| #2 | IT | Threyzii | 46% | 152 |
| #3 | CTWKingッ | 41% | 17 |
| #4 | IT | IHightower | 36% | 14 |
| #5 | miT231 | 35% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | boob | 6 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | IT | Threyzii | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | miT231 | 3 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | IT | IHightower | 2 | 0.0077 |
| #5 | CTWKingッ | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | boob | 169 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #2 | IT | Threyzii | 84 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #3 | miT231 | 66 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | CTWKingッ | 42 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | IT | IHightower | 32 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | boob | +5.40 | 74 | 66 |
| #2 | miT231 | +5.31 | 79 | 64 |
| #3 | CTWKingッ | +4.43 | 56 | 49 |
| #4 | IT | ZeroEgal | -0.09 | 39 | 52 |
| #5 | IT | Threyzii | -1.01 | 37 | 38 |





