








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 245 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 164 matches | ||
| Premier | 118 matches | ||
| Wingman | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 87 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3393 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,028 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1903 | 16% |
| Smokes | 4239 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 2661 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3225 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,430,283 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 314 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tigibus | 60% | 98 |
| #2 | Niro | 60% | 47 |
| #3 | Pouککi™ | 57% | 51 |
| #4 | GEnom!c | 54% | 114 |
| #5 | louss | 53% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | El doctor | 51% | 90 |
| #7 | DOOMGAST | 50% | 30 |
| #8 | BeNNNNN ♿ ⛟ | 44% | 61 |
| #9 | NonoNAZ | 43% | 28 |
| #10 | TheNoThreat | 35% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Niro | 12 | 0.0127 |
| #2 | GEnom!c | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Tigibus | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | Pouککi™ | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | NonoNAZ | 3 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GEnom!c | 537 | 0.23 | 14 min |
| #2 | El doctor | 380 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #3 | Tigibus | 299 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #4 | BeNNNNN ♿ ⛟ | 293 | 0.22 | 6 min |
| #5 | TheNoThreat | 116 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Niro | +4.22 | 80 | 44 |
| #2 | Hed | +0.99 | 42 | 61 |
| #3 | Tigibus | +0.52 | 55 | 71 |
| #4 | GEnom!c | +0.47 | 66 | 69 |
| #5 | DOOMGAST | -0.13 | 52 | 46 |





