








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 228 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 107 matches | ||
| Faceit | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1998 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,322 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1787 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2191 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1591 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1753 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $465,388 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 104 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | adi | 55% | 11 |
| #2 | fAIJAMONN[1]#KMOVTN | 55% | 55 |
| #3 | Pr1Mo | 54% | 65 |
| #4 | timpapz | 52% | 88 |
| #5 | Lti | 50% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lti | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | timpapz | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | Pr1Mo | 2 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vALENTINO | +3.27 | 71 | 76 |
| #2 | kahvi | +0.95 | 82 | 65 |
| #3 | paspas | +0.50 | 74 | 63 |
| #4 | Pr1Mo | -0.72 | 64 | 66 |
| #5 | timpapz | -0.90 | 63 | 71 |





