








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 175 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Premier | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1430 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,425 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 604 | 18% |
| Smokes | 640 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1135 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1046 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $389,183 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 144 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | kAwet | 53% | 59 |
| #4 | OMAR M'A TUER ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ | 50% | 8 |
| #5 | Dks | 43% | 7 |
| #6 | BA.Kazma - Styve | 30% | 10 |
| #7 | 神 Shen ☯ | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kAwet | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | CLVN | 1 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | 神 Shen ☯ | 1 | 0.0069 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kAwet | 29 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #2 | 神 Shen ☯ | 22 | 0.15 | 0 min |
| #3 | Dks | 20 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #4 | OMAR M'A TUER ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ | 19 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | CLVN | 10 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NoG | +3.41 | 88 | 67 |
| #2 | Dks | +0.42 | 82 | 76 |
| #3 | CLVN | -0.37 | 48 | 56 |
| #4 | 神 Shen ☯ | -0.57 | 70 | 67 |
| #5 | kAwet | -0.63 | 86 | 47 |





