








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1686 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 235 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 203 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 105 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 47 matches | ||
| Wingman | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 38 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 169 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8437 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 38,638 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 15254 | 39% |
| Smokes | 9463 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 9182 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4739 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,003,603 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 222 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MK | 59% | 282 |
| #2 | Br0k3n. | 57% | 240 |
| #3 | Karthongo | 56% | 81 |
| #4 | Willi | 55% | 159 |
| #5 | Ragnarus | 55% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheMicroMexican | 24 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | MK | 14 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Willi | 14 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | Paexl | 10 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | Br0k3n. | 9 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheMicroMexican | 2109 | 0.18 | 53 min |
| #2 | MK | 886 | 0.15 | 22 min |
| #3 | PicoPacino ツ | 672 | 0.19 | 18 min |
| #4 | Br0k3n. | 595 | 0.12 | 17 min |
| #5 | Paexl | 550 | 0.19 | 14 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Willi | +3.95 | 84 | 73 |
| #2 | gQ #a0s | +1.60 | 70 | 74 |
| #3 | MK | +1.54 | 81 | 78 |
| #4 | ☯D3aTron1X☯ | +1.29 | 85 | 57 |
| #5 | TheMicroMexican | +0.86 | 74 | 74 |





