








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 818 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 669 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 155 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 129 matches | ||
| Wingman | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 155 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




56 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10537 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,351 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2380 | 7% |
| Smokes | 10246 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 13599 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 9126 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,951,150 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8231 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jNk ΰ«# | 54% | 95 |
| #2 | Flowtyx | 51% | 117 |
| #3 | Jack_your_ass | 50% | 274 |
| #4 | TheSWISSguy | 49% | 190 |
| #5 | Hubi <3 | 46% | 145 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FaTroll | 35 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | .null | 21 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | Jack_your_ass | 20 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | TheSWISSguy | 18 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | .#SchumiLove<3 | 9 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jNk ΰ«# | 477 | 0.25 | 12 min |
| #2 | .null | 383 | 0.04 | 7 min |
| #3 | FaTroll | 374 | 0.04 | 8 min |
| #4 | Jack_your_ass | 366 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| #5 | Hubi <3 | 301 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheSWISSguy | +4.84 | 48 | 64 |
| #2 | jNk ΰ«# | +2.38 | 53 | 68 |
| #3 | ββ―VitaMinβ―Tβ€Hβ€Cβ―β | +1.74 | 29 | 40 |
| #4 | Jack_your_ass | +1.12 | 51 | 55 |
| #5 | .#SchumiLove<3 | +1.02 | 44 | 63 |





