








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 199 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 296 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3761 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,327 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2470 | 20% |
| Smokes | 3688 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3103 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3066 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,509,553 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 155 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Goavääpeli | 46% | 70 |
| #11 | Panomies | 45% | 211 |
| #12 | Japa91 | 42% | 225 |
| #13 | Tz | 40% | 152 |
| #14 | Ryba | 40% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Neonos | 8 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Saaresi | 8 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | Tz | 7 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Pepe Julian Onziema | 6 | 0.0059 |
| #5 | Itis Wat Itis | 5 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saaresi | 366 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #2 | Japa91 | 319 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #3 | Neonos | 311 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #4 | Stifu | 291 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #5 | Panomies | 286 | 0.07 | 7 min |





