








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 42 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
1029 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,388 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1030 | 43% |
| Smokes | 390 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 523 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 445 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $217,313 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | quick | 82% | 11 |
| #2 | BluT | 74% | 19 |
| #3 | ✪ KnaxX. | 71% | 7 |
| #4 | Zorn1g | 65% | 20 |
| #5 | SamBaPiT | 57% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | otsch | 50% | 8 |
| #9 | zetschmo7 | 50% | 8 |
| #10 | cpo | 48% | 46 |
| #11 | kentman_ | 43% | 30 |
| #12 | taylOr | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cpo | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | e_ | 2 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | BluT | 1 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | quick | 1 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cpo | 251 | 0.26 | 9 min |
| #2 | Zorn1g | 98 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #3 | BluT | 63 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | Gaindalf | 62 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | e_ | 60 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zorn1g | +4.00 | 80 | 71 |
| #2 | BluT | +1.83 | 70 | 76 |
| #3 | SamBaPiT | +1.49 | 72 | 74 |
| #4 | cpo | +0.85 | 67 | 73 |
| #5 | stui | +0.42 | 72 | 58 |





