








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
455 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 837 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 213 | 25% |
| Smokes | 237 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 103 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 284 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $92,630 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Benenuts | 92% | 12 |
| #2 | zouni | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | Kerffu | 75% | 8 |
| #4 | GiL Steel | 69% | 39 |
| #5 | Twix | 68% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GiL Steel | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Twix | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | sKipz | 1 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | Benenuts | 1 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GiL Steel | 146 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #2 | GiL Weo | 63 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | sKipz | 59 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #4 | Twix | 52 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | Benenuts | 35 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Twix | +6.33 | 96 | 55 |
| #2 | Kerffu | +3.26 | 74 | 43 |
| #3 | sKipz | +2.38 | 69 | 63 |
| #4 | Rickylicious | +2.01 | 74 | 61 |
| #5 | GiL Weo | +1.45 | 47 | 66 |





