








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1030 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 228 matches | ||
| Faceit | 159 matches | ||
| Premier | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3757 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,066 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6856 | 34% |
| Smokes | 5139 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3684 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 4387 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,305,460 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 797 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dhE- | 52% | 75 |
| #2 | Moon | 52% | 133 |
| #3 | Frodo | 50% | 30 |
| #4 | ♛ Farlige Bondo | 50% | 103 |
| #5 | ʎʞɔᴉɹʇ | 47% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Moon | 52% | 133 |
| #3 | Frodo | 50% | 30 |
| #4 | ♛ Farlige Bondo | 50% | 103 |
| #5 | ʎʞɔᴉɹʇ | 47% | 83 |
| #6 | two-tired | 45% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moon | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | ʎʞɔᴉɹʇ | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | two-tired | 4 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moon | 484 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #2 | ♛ Farlige Bondo | 465 | 0.20 | 15 min |
| #3 | ʎʞɔᴉɹʇ | 170 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | dhE- | 112 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | two-tired | 52 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xxZieglerPrime | +1.38 | 75 | 68 |
| #2 | Moon | +1.38 | 69 | 71 |
| #3 | Frodo | +0.65 | 57 | 51 |
| #4 | dhE- | +0.31 | 70 | 60 |
| #5 | ♛ Farlige Bondo | +0.30 | 53 | 74 |





