








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1646 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 213 matches | ||
| Faceit | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5084 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,429 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7428 | 38% |
| Smokes | 4757 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2470 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 4774 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $945,863 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 996 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | two-tired | 9 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | xxZieglerPrime | 6 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | dhE- | 5 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | ʎʞɔᴉɹʇ | 5 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Mepsen 🧶 | 5 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xxZieglerPrime | 757 | 0.26 | 18 min |
| #2 | dhE- | 510 | 0.08 | 13 min |
| #3 | ʎʞɔᴉɹʇ | 376 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #4 | two-tired | 221 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #5 | Mepsen 🧶 | 92 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mepsen 🧶 | +4.73 | 89 | 61 |
| #2 | Moon | +2.75 | 75 | 70 |
| #3 | xxZieglerPrime | +2.14 | 74 | 69 |
| #4 | dhE- | +0.72 | 73 | 56 |
| #5 | ♛ Z3L1 | -1.47 | 53 | 41 |





