










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
812 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,357 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2152 | 40% |
| Smokes | 1799 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 656 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 750 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $318,317 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | grolton | 44% | 18 |
| #2 | LiquidFlux | 43% | 58 |
| #3 | jason | 41% | 70 |
| #4 | N1kou | 37% | 51 |
| #5 | gato de humo | 37% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | grolton | 44% | 18 |
| #2 | LiquidFlux | 43% | 58 |
| #3 | jason | 41% | 70 |
| #4 | N1kou | 37% | 51 |
| #5 | gato de humo | 37% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jason | 10 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | N1kou | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | gato de humo | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | LiquidFlux | 2 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jason | 405 | 0.29 | 8 min |
| #2 | gato de humo | 254 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #3 | LiquidFlux | 158 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | N1kou | 52 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | grolton | 27 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jason | +2.09 | 77 | 46 |
| #2 | gato de humo | +1.56 | 68 | 56 |
| #3 | grolton | -0.32 | 68 | 54 |
| #4 | LiquidFlux | -0.46 | 56 | 49 |
| #5 | N1kou | -1.85 | 11 | 49 |





