








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 15 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 215 matches | ||
| Faceit | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3553 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,132 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4763 | 26% |
| Smokes | 5495 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4421 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3453 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,214,364 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 13 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | winkla | 54% | 325 |
| #2 | fsociety' s!mp$on | 52% | 164 |
| #3 | SmO_ovE | 51% | 237 |
| #4 | XS1CHT | 51% | 373 |
| #5 | iDistanz | 45% | 171 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | winkla | 54% | 325 |
| #2 | fsociety' s!mp$on | 52% | 164 |
| #3 | SmO_ovE | 51% | 237 |
| #4 | XS1CHT | 51% | 373 |
| #5 | iDistanz | 45% | 171 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XS1CHT | 9 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | winkla | 5 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | iDistanz | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | SmO_ovE | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | fsociety' s!mp$on | 2 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | winkla | 1008 | 0.15 | 32 min |
| #2 | XS1CHT | 902 | 0.12 | 26 min |
| #3 | fsociety' s!mp$on | 647 | 0.19 | 16 min |
| #4 | iDistanz | 437 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #5 | SmO_ovE | 379 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | winkla | +2.43 | 88 | 76 |
| #2 | fsociety' s!mp$on | +0.46 | 66 | 72 |
| #3 | XS1CHT | +0.38 | 70 | 76 |
| #4 | SmO_ovE | +0.24 | 76 | 65 |
| #5 | blackstylez´ | -1.38 | 71 | 72 |





