








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2136 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 668 matches | ||
| Faceit | 153 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12797 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 36,599 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11618 | 32% |
| Smokes | 7966 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 7425 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 9590 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,616,675 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4131 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | taqifaisal | 79% | 291 |
| #2 | Enzo | 75% | 435 |
| #3 | farooqoq | 73% | 358 |
| #4 | AcId-1 | 69% | 457 |
| #5 | Pluto | 69% | 466 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Pluto | 69% | 466 |
| #6 | Cawbaghelele | 67% | 181 |
| #7 | Naughty | 64% | 50 |
| #8 | UnderWorld-Don | 63% | 262 |
| #9 | PantheR-^yw | 53% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | farooqoq | 34 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | Enzo | 31 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | taqifaisal | 15 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | AcId-1 | 14 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Pluto | 11 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | farooqoq | 1994 | 0.28 | 51 min |
| #2 | AcId-1 | 1853 | 0.20 | 53 min |
| #3 | Pluto | 1676 | 0.18 | 46 min |
| #4 | Enzo | 1470 | 0.17 | 37 min |
| #5 | taqifaisal | 568 | 0.10 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Momo | +4.33 | 86 | 77 |
| #2 | taqifaisal | +1.79 | 74 | 57 |
| #3 | Pluto | +1.21 | 78 | 67 |
| #4 | AcId-1 | +0.56 | 87 | 58 |
| #5 | farooqoq | +0.52 | 85 | 68 |





