








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 340 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 206 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2212 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,957 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 734 | 12% |
| Smokes | 1653 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1909 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1661 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,130,284 of utility $181 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 69 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oFi❟❛❟ | 63% | 16 |
| #2 | Zygi | 55% | 101 |
| #3 | Teh_Q | 50% | 121 |
| #4 | Mr. Misiek | 49% | 69 |
| #5 | prof. Alzheimer | 48% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zygi | 201 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #2 | KarlaK | 146 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #3 | Mr. Misiek | 128 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | Kenny | 122 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | oFi❟❛❟ | 74 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KarlaK | +3.46 | 78 | 70 |
| #2 | oFi❟❛❟ | +2.41 | 60 | 69 |
| #3 | Zygi | +1.14 | 46 | 60 |
| #4 | Tourette Turtle | +0.41 | 61 | 46 |
| #5 | Mr. Misiek | -0.33 | 42 | 49 |





