








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 164 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 333 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4459 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,458 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4114 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3679 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2675 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1990 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,719,230 of utility $191 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 59 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Karveli | 46% | 46 |
| #6 | BOT J-N | 45% | 33 |
| #7 | Rubber Flying Squirrel | 44% | 32 |
| #8 | hevonen | 43% | 23 |
| #9 | Zsumppi | 38% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BOT J-N | 3 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | Kalabaliiki | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | Joakiiiimmm | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | DrGerhard1 | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | hevonen | 2 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kalabaliiki | +1.57 | 56 | 70 |
| #2 | DrGerhard1 | +1.51 | 49 | 66 |
| #3 | BOT J-N | +1.26 | 68 | 62 |
| #4 | No Olaf, No Party! | +1.11 | 67 | 65 |
| #5 | Rubber Flying Squirrel | +0.97 | 64 | 75 |





