








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 118 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1924 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,096 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4242 | 42% |
| Smokes | 2847 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1073 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 1934 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $649,240 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 55 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheNyanCat217 | 63% | 54 |
| #2 | KAPPA | 60% | 63 |
| #3 | Dexxxxx | 60% | 15 |
| #4 | Player | 60% | 15 |
| #5 | Deer_X | 60% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheNyanCat217 | 5 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | Player | 4 | 0.0136 |
| #3 | KAPPA | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Deer_X | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Blacknote | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KAPPA | 157 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #2 | ballex | 141 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | d00m | 134 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #4 | TheNyanCat217 | 115 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | Blacknote | 114 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Player | +5.83 | 81 | 77 |
| #2 | TheNyanCat217 | +4.47 | 83 | 68 |
| #3 | Cinimoddd | +2.69 | 83 | 71 |
| #4 | KAPPA | +2.19 | 62 | 66 |
| #5 | Ɗαяк_Oяcнєѕтяα ❦ | +1.05 | 64 | 68 |





