








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
337 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,903 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 498 | 26% |
| Smokes | 521 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 486 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 398 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $38,711 of utility $48 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GH057ayame | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | Jiffrey | 100% | 2 |
| #3 | Kyez | 100% | 2 |
| #4 | steeez | 100% | 2 |
| #5 | mkee | 100% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChrisV | 1 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | wAKKa | 1 | 0.0065 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GRMZ | 29 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #2 | t3zz | 23 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| #3 | ChrisV | 21 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #4 | GH057ayame | 20 | 0.56 | 0 min |
| #5 | mkee | 15 | 0.21 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jiffrey | +10.87 | 85 | 50 |
| #2 | t3zz | +3.92 | 88 | 59 |
| #3 | mkee | +3.52 | 92 | 64 |
| #4 | steeez | +2.18 | 55 | 79 |
| #5 | wAKKa | +1.79 | 97 | 54 |





