








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2290 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 717 matches | ||
| Premier | 449 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 112 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 59 matches | ||
| Faceit | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 123 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




112 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
24214 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 45,096 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 15275 | 34% |
| Smokes | 6753 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 12384 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 10684 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,887,640 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2699 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .Fj | 85% | 177 |
| #2 | Cache Man | 82% | 127 |
| #3 | Jimbob | 80% | 169 |
| #4 | shift | 78% | 294 |
| #5 | pamke | 70% | 118 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Steaux | 66% | 112 |
| #11 | n0ize | 65% | 95 |
| #12 | hR | 59% | 151 |
| #13 | ambassador | 57% | 181 |
| #14 | mydd | 44% | 204 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mydd | 129 | 0.0324 |
| #2 | Salty Snake | 48 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | .jib | 42 | 0.0159 |
| #4 | hR | 34 | 0.0106 |
| #5 | shift | 31 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ambassador | 673 | 0.18 | 18 min |
| #2 | Salty Snake | 656 | 0.06 | 13 min |
| #3 | Steaux | 565 | 0.24 | 17 min |
| #4 | mydd | 490 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #5 | hR | 476 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cache Man | +4.95 | 65 | 48 |
| #2 | Tuna | +3.48 | 79 | 61 |
| #3 | Jimbob | +2.22 | 61 | 55 |
| #4 | drunk bee | +1.97 | 84 | 51 |
| #5 | n0ize | +1.90 | 88 | 65 |





