








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 875 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 377 matches | ||
| Faceit | 112 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 49 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5699 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,439 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8047 | 32% |
| Smokes | 6718 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 6698 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3976 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,663,581 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 217 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Edwearth | 60% | 45 |
| #2 | monky ♿ | 58% | 142 |
| #3 | Phoxor | 55% | 168 |
| #4 | ☯ Zoid` Woop Woop | 55% | 154 |
| #5 | cathkar | 54% | 197 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RosesAreRed | 5 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | Phoxor | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | *Razor-Ramon * | 4 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | ggpotier | 4 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | Harry Potier | 3 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | *Razor-Ramon * | 638 | 0.11 | 13 min |
| #2 | cathkar | 619 | 0.15 | 18 min |
| #3 | RosesAreRed | 351 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #4 | Harry Potier | 347 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #5 | monky ♿ | 335 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cathkar | +2.71 | 86 | 69 |
| #2 | Phoxor | +0.93 | 83 | 42 |
| #3 | ☯ Zoid` Woop Woop | +0.80 | 75 | 62 |
| #4 | abNul | +0.69 | 75 | 72 |
| #5 | RosesAreRed | +0.53 | 79 | 49 |





