








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 153 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 91 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1085 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,665 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 672 | 14% |
| Smokes | 1625 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 1057 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1311 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $527,936 of utility $171 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 121 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MvhÖster | 51% | 70 |
| #2 | 8SON | 50% | 42 |
| #3 | Gilius | 47% | 110 |
| #4 | аgge | 47% | 17 |
| #5 | Kingkongshowdown | 46% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Gilius | 47% | 110 |
| #4 | аgge | 47% | 17 |
| #5 | Kingkongshowdown | 46% | 69 |
| #6 | Kaos Karlsson | 44% | 50 |
| #7 | Bero | 42% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gilius | 5 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | MvhÖster | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Bero | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Kaos Karlsson | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Kingkongshowdown | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gilius | 183 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #2 | Bero | 161 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #3 | Kingkongshowdown | 146 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | MvhÖster | 143 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | Kaos Karlsson | 61 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 8SON | +2.23 | 63 | 59 |
| #2 | аgge | +1.31 | 51 | 71 |
| #3 | Kingkongshowdown | +1.22 | 64 | 63 |
| #4 | MvhÖster | +0.80 | 50 | 67 |
| #5 | Gilius | +0.64 | 58 | 68 |





