








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 9 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 168 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5359 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,866 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3361 | 43% |
| Smokes | 2401 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 931 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 1173 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $613,144 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2307 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boah | 64% | 53 |
| #2 | TONY TONIC | 63% | 41 |
| #3 | Nano | 59% | 100 |
| #4 | GnoleCoriace | 57% | 121 |
| #5 | LZ PiKOoZ13 | 57% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | LZ PiKOoZ13 | 57% | 23 |
| #6 | SmiLy | 54% | 46 |
| #7 | Mr Jack | 49% | 55 |
| #8 | Billy توكو بيلي | 47% | 30 |
| #9 | LzN | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nano | 17 | 0.0088 |
| #2 | GnoleCoriace | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Mr Jack | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | TONY TONIC | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Boah | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nano | 441 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #2 | GnoleCoriace | 272 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | TONY TONIC | 156 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #4 | Mr Jack | 124 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | SmiLy | 99 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TiLiLi | +4.07 | 85 | 52 |
| #2 | TONY TONIC | +1.89 | 72 | 65 |
| #3 | Mr Jack | +0.79 | 45 | 51 |
| #4 | LzN | +0.23 | 71 | 52 |
| #5 | Nano | -0.58 | 55 | 56 |





