








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 344 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 88 matches | ||
| Esplay | 17 matches | 1,822 | |
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2103 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,621 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2561 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2174 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1766 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2120 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $378,489 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 197 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | g0ldyy | 77% | 13 |
| #2 | deedee | 55% | 53 |
| #3 | hrh | 52% | 52 |
| #4 | Maldoren | 52% | 29 |
| #5 | Thez | 43% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deedee | 4 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Brooke Logan | 3 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Thez | 3 | 0.0069 |
| #4 | Nottie | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | siNppa | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | siNppa | 377 | 0.21 | 11 min |
| #2 | deedee | 346 | 0.31 | 11 min |
| #3 | hrh | 321 | 0.29 | 10 min |
| #4 | waytookebab | 316 | 0.27 | 9 min |
| #5 | Ønlinehero | 297 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ønlinehero | +3.56 | 86 | 73 |
| #2 | deedee | +2.94 | 77 | 81 |
| #3 | Brooke Logan | +1.14 | 86 | 46 |
| #4 | g0ldyy | +1.08 | 83 | 81 |
| #5 | Maldoren | +0.90 | 73 | 65 |





