








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 37 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
239 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 704 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 196 | 28% |
| Smokes | 138 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 220 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 150 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $106,418 of utility $209 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 67 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | A B S 1 C H T Sr. | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | Cast0r Jr. | 100% | 3 |
| #3 | Jerkstar Jr. | 100% | 5 |
| #4 | L-Capowned Jr. | 80% | 5 |
| #5 | Ad0nis der Bäinis Jr. | 71% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Quid PRO Quo Jr. | 25 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #2 | A B S 1 C H T Jr. | 20 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #3 | Ad0nis der Bäinis Jr. | 13 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #4 | Jerkstar Jr. | 10 | 0.15 | 0 min |
| #5 | Cast0r Jr. | 7 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cast0r Jr. | +9.28 | 57 | 78 |
| #2 | Jerkstar Jr. | +8.77 | 58 | 62 |
| #3 | L-Capowned Jr. | +6.31 | 58 | 44 |
| #4 | A B S 1 C H T Jr. | +5.63 | 64 | 59 |
| #5 | A B S 1 C H T Sr. | +5.51 | 56 | 54 |





