








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 89 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
975 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,982 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 722 | 24% |
| Smokes | 531 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 755 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 974 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $327,571 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | drag | 82% | 11 |
| #2 | 1sonny | 64% | 11 |
| #3 | ph65bee | 59% | 17 |
| #4 | deine mutter | 58% | 33 |
| #5 | anna | 57% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lolly | 4 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | t0ss | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | Demonio | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | ph65bee | 1 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | anna | 1 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | t0ss | 302 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #2 | Lolly | 69 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | Demonio | 44 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | drag | 38 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #5 | 1sonny | 34 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | drag | +8.46 | 87 | 72 |
| #2 | t0ss | +1.26 | 64 | 68 |
| #3 | DCX | +1.23 | 61 | 48 |
| #4 | deine mutter | +1.15 | 80 | 50 |
| #5 | 1sonny | +0.75 | 72 | 53 |





