








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 49 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Renown | 149 matches | ||
| Premier | 142 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 87 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3602 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,836 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5558 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3722 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 4230 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3326 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $776,633 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 166 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jqlifice | 68% | 22 |
| #2 | cuBEHHH | 62% | 37 |
| #3 | Bye for now | 57% | 134 |
| #4 | KC | 53% | 133 |
| #5 | Enigma | 52% | 270 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | BoB | 51% | 89 |
| #7 | fo` | 49% | 77 |
| #8 | SANDWICH ♿ | 42% | 24 |
| #9 | Danny | 36% | 22 |
| #10 | AF SharkBearz | 28% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bye for now | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Enigma | 4 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | fo` | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | KC | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | BoB | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bye for now | 415 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #2 | BoB | 239 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #3 | fo` | 176 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #4 | Enigma | 142 | 0.02 | 4 min |
| #5 | KC | 82 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | qwerty.nick | +1.13 | 76 | 73 |
| #2 | BoB | +0.60 | 70 | 77 |
| #3 | AF SharkBearz | +0.21 | 81 | 75 |
| #4 | KC | +0.01 | 76 | 48 |
| #5 | Danny | -0.19 | 64 | 38 |





