








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 116 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 46 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2347 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,819 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4142 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2940 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3273 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2464 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $678,565 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 204 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CeeJ | 53% | 53 |
| #2 | ZSPIRp1 | 50% | 14 |
| #3 | Nixs | 50% | 16 |
| #4 | sEq | 47% | 17 |
| #5 | DeeJers | 45% | 234 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DeeJers | 979 | 0.21 | 25 min |
| #2 | sEq | 77 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #3 | CeeJ | 55 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | ZSPIRp1 | 49 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | Nixs | 35 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZSPIRp1 | +1.87 | 75 | 66 |
| #2 | Nixs | +1.40 | 58 | 57 |
| #3 | CeeJ | +0.93 | 77 | 56 |
| #4 | sEq | +0.63 | 66 | 70 |
| #5 | DeeJers | -0.28 | 48 | 74 |





