








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1125 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 345 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 108 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




43 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4961 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,819 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2344 | 20% |
| Smokes | 2386 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3837 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 3252 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,326,567 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 122 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M1sterL | 12 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | Whitebeard | 11 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | füssélrûlèzz | 10 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | Rexidexi | 8 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | m0kka | 8 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DevilStyleZ | 848 | 0.26 | 26 min |
| #2 | Rexidexi | 845 | 0.24 | 22 min |
| #3 | M1sterL | 562 | 0.23 | 16 min |
| #4 | Whitebeard | 408 | 0.13 | 12 min |
| #5 | füssélrûlèzz | 364 | 0.14 | 9 min |





