








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 979 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 242 matches | ||
| Faceit | 66 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3718 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,609 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2598 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2359 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1440 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 3212 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,729,485 of utility $224 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1115 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | christy | 54% | 109 |
| #2 | Peppa | 51% | 69 |
| #3 | w h i t e b o y | 50% | 181 |
| #4 | MIKE MIKE MIKE MIKE | 49% | 93 |
| #5 | torjebosen | 47% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | christy | 54% | 109 |
| #2 | Peppa | 51% | 69 |
| #3 | w h i t e b o y | 50% | 181 |
| #4 | MIKE MIKE MIKE MIKE | 49% | 93 |
| #5 | torjebosen | 47% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | w h i t e b o y | 13 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | christy | 9 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | MIKE MIKE MIKE MIKE | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Peppa | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | torjebosen | 3 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | w h i t e b o y | 543 | 0.14 | 14 min |
| #2 | christy | 502 | 0.22 | 12 min |
| #3 | MIKE MIKE MIKE MIKE | 382 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #4 | Peppa | 221 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #5 | torjebosen | 140 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Peppa | +1.48 | 85 | 58 |
| #2 | smada | +0.56 | 75 | 59 |
| #3 | christy | +0.07 | 59 | 63 |
| #4 | w h i t e b o y | +0.05 | 68 | 56 |
| #5 | MIKE MIKE MIKE MIKE | -0.39 | 81 | 55 |





