








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 91 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1516 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,974 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1727 | 35% |
| Smokes | 1040 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1021 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1186 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $611,976 of utility $204 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 64 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ed0 | 44% | 9 |
| #2 | krause.percocet | 44% | 18 |
| #3 | RageCum 469 | 40% | 20 |
| #4 | T҉A҉I҉N҉T҉ | 39% | 28 |
| #5 | J3llo Wit-A-Blick | 39% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J3llo Wit-A-Blick | 5 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | LilKrokE | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | TwiztedAgony | 1 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | krause.percocet | 1 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Ed0 | 1 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LilKrokE | 375 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #2 | kjiv | 265 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #3 | J3llo Wit-A-Blick | 172 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | T҉A҉I҉N҉T҉ | 81 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | Rum-n-KrokE | 69 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ed0 | +3.36 | 84 | 75 |
| #2 | Kroeker | +1.14 | 48 | 66 |
| #3 | kjiv | +0.79 | 64 | 53 |
| #4 | TwiztedAgony | +0.12 | 36 | 15 |
| #5 | RageCum 469 | -0.42 | 75 | 49 |





