








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 41 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 154 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1754 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,422 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1886 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2307 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1937 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1292 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $728,697 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | its me, juan! | 47% | 148 |
| #2 | gTH | 46% | 173 |
| #3 | åns | 45% | 165 |
| #4 | neo | 42% | 81 |
| #5 | CA7 | 42% | 159 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | gTH | 46% | 173 |
| #3 | åns | 45% | 165 |
| #4 | neo | 42% | 81 |
| #5 | CA7 | 42% | 159 |
| #6 | thqst | 40% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | åns | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | CA7 | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | gTH | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | its me, juan! | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | neo | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gTH | 443 | 0.12 | 12 min |
| #2 | its me, juan! | 321 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #3 | åns | 317 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #4 | neo | 157 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #5 | CA7 | 89 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | its me, juan! | +2.42 | 72 | 76 |
| #2 | thqst | +1.78 | 73 | 68 |
| #3 | åns | +0.56 | 48 | 68 |
| #4 | gTH | -0.90 | 53 | 77 |
| #5 | Schnatterer#7 | -0.98 | 41 | 76 |





