








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 647 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 834 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 32 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9741 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,941 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2819 | 13% |
| Smokes | 6423 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 6030 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 6669 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,947,397 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1269 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tush | 55% | 100 |
| #2 | evilch1ck3n | 53% | 60 |
| #3 | bLaZe | 51% | 143 |
| #4 | ♥Bubbles♥ | 48% | 139 |
| #5 | Shooter | 48% | 124 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Chia LaBeouf | 46% | 94 |
| #7 | Nutty | 43% | 195 |
| #8 | l3ouncer | 42% | 152 |
| #9 | Derski | 41% | 73 |
| #10 | Digital Diva | 40% | 144 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bLaZe | 8 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Digital Diva | 7 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | l3ouncer | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Tush | 6 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | ♥Bubbles♥ | 5 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shooter | 670 | 0.27 | 13 min |
| #2 | Tush | 550 | 0.26 | 15 min |
| #3 | bLaZe | 297 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #4 | ♥Bubbles♥ | 271 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #5 | Chia LaBeouf | 267 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bLaZe | +3.52 | 80 | 45 |
| #2 | evilch1ck3n | +2.13 | 69 | 52 |
| #3 | Tush | +1.19 | 63 | 79 |
| #4 | Shooter | +1.01 | 31 | 56 |
| #5 | Nutty | +0.39 | 36 | 49 |





