








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 239 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 117 matches | ||
| Faceit | 79 matches | ||
| Wingman | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Renown | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4616 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,496 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2643 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2361 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2115 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2377 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,359,314 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 196 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | carrymoN | 63% | 43 |
| #2 | Shivâ | 62% | 60 |
| #3 | Hans Dampf | 59% | 151 |
| #4 | cRu | 56% | 68 |
| #5 | revaage | 51% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hans Dampf | 8 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Shivâ | 5 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | revaage | 3 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | cRu | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | carrymoN | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cRu | 525 | 0.39 | 15 min |
| #2 | Hans Dampf | 338 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | Shivâ | 241 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #4 | ZappelNinja | 146 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | revaage | 132 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cRu | +3.99 | 87 | 82 |
| #2 | ZappelNinja | +2.45 | 79 | 62 |
| #3 | mrkanek1(i like gothmommys) | +2.36 | 82 | 33 |
| #4 | carrymoN | +1.49 | 64 | 45 |
| #5 | ♰Stay♰ | +1.34 | 77 | 44 |





