








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 887 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 593 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 52 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4440 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,101 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7079 | 28% |
| Smokes | 7286 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 5487 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 5249 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,867,663 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 168 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツ ViDDiNHO ツ | 48% | 265 |
| #2 | Exekjuter | 48% | 44 |
| #3 | Howsie | 47% | 118 |
| #4 | Westeras | 46% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツ ViDDiNHO ツ | 48% | 265 |
| #2 | Exekjuter | 48% | 44 |
| #3 | Howsie | 47% | 118 |
| #4 | Westeras | 46% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツ ViDDiNHO ツ | 11 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Howsie | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Exekjuter | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Westeras | 2 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツ ViDDiNHO ツ | 830 | 0.15 | 23 min |
| #2 | Westeras | 104 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | Howsie | 81 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #4 | Exekjuter | 50 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Exekjuter | +2.65 | 80 | 59 |
| #2 | Howsie | +0.56 | 66 | 59 |
| #3 | ツ ViDDiNHO ツ | +0.34 | 49 | 70 |
| #4 | Kapten | -0.76 | 63 | 70 |
| #5 | Westeras | -1.37 | 48 | 69 |





