








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 377 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 176 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2536 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,099 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2680 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2602 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2233 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2584 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $720,184 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nostra | 57% | 14 |
| #2 | saikorhino | 56% | 18 |
| #3 | lemon | 53% | 15 |
| #4 | crEx | 53% | 45 |
| #5 | Banana Joe | 53% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CH'TUNGU | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | brunob | 3 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | nostra | 3 | 0.0102 |
| #4 | ✪ hippi1 | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | NeroBEA$T | 2 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ hippi1 | 876 | 0.27 | 29 min |
| #2 | CH'TUNGU | 454 | 0.17 | 12 min |
| #3 | crEx | 219 | 0.23 | 5 min |
| #4 | CNNN | 146 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #5 | NeroBEA$T | 140 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hades | +3.25 | 79 | 73 |
| #2 | saikorhino | +2.98 | 88 | 64 |
| #3 | lemon | +1.88 | 42 | 48 |
| #4 | point | +1.73 | 88 | 73 |
| #5 | ryuaner | +0.94 | 80 | 73 |





