








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 57 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 283 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2797 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,633 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2553 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3197 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3057 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2826 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $983,419 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vlocity160 | 49% | 109 |
| #2 | KingKitty | 48% | 233 |
| #3 | saburo | 47% | 240 |
| #4 | griMM | 46% | 316 |
| #5 | insanebob | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dFUZE' | 9 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | KingKitty | 8 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | griMM | 5 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | saburo | 5 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | vlocity160 | 4 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | griMM | 1405 | 0.21 | 41 min |
| #2 | KingKitty | 733 | 0.15 | 18 min |
| #3 | saburo | 648 | 0.13 | 16 min |
| #4 | dFUZE' | 627 | 0.12 | 16 min |
| #5 | Code0r | 371 | 0.18 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dFUZE' | +1.46 | 75 | 71 |
| #2 | saburo | +0.77 | 75 | 69 |
| #3 | Rahz | +0.62 | 81 | 63 |
| #4 | KingKitty | +0.34 | 71 | 59 |
| #5 | vlocity160 | -0.96 | 54 | 49 |





