








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1532 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 758 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7608 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,365 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4182 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3230 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 6760 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 2193 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,633,566 of utility $201 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 260 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sLx | 58% | 60 |
| #2 | Don KanaiLLe | 51% | 45 |
| #3 | ItsMoo | 50% | 125 |
| #4 | Backmischung | 46% | 76 |
| #5 | sLx | 44% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Backmischung | 46% | 76 |
| #5 | sLx | 44% | 45 |
| #6 | @meeehluis | 43% | 316 |
| #7 | Shakalaka | 40% | 296 |
| #8 | Jessi_Milka | 39% | 233 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | @meeehluis | 4 | 0.0006 |
| #2 | Shakalaka | 3 | 0.0005 |
| #3 | ItsMoo | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Jessi_Milka | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | Backmischung | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | @meeehluis | 481 | 0.07 | 11 min |
| #2 | ItsMoo | 326 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | Shakalaka | 257 | 0.04 | 7 min |
| #4 | Don KanaiLLe | 128 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | sLx | 126 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sLx | +2.63 | 75 | 67 |
| #2 | sLx | +1.28 | 73 | 68 |
| #3 | @meeehluis | +1.19 | 58 | 45 |
| #4 | Don KanaiLLe | +1.17 | 77 | 61 |
| #5 | ItsMoo | +0.66 | 58 | 61 |





