








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 558 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 372 matches | ||
| Faceit | 320 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 89 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6517 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 36,010 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9967 | 28% |
| Smokes | 9862 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 8701 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 7480 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,335,067 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 550 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | royaL64 | 62% | 84 |
| #2 | .LastNagger ☁ | 62% | 47 |
| #3 | xDaddyDeadx | 61% | 105 |
| #4 | s岩倉 | 56% | 75 |
| #5 | SMuRKツ | 56% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | ✡wafa✡shylock✡ | 53% | 51 |
| #10 | deLirious | 50% | 50 |
| #11 | mc64 | 47% | 96 |
| #12 | righteous | 46% | 82 |
| #13 | PRIEST64 | 44% | 161 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PRIEST64 | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | .LastNagger ☁ | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | drEnergy | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | mc64 | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | righteous | 2 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xDaddyDeadx | 549 | 0.24 | 16 min |
| #2 | righteous | 370 | 0.20 | 11 min |
| #3 | nnikkitine; ♡ | 290 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #4 | mc64 | 249 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #5 | royaL64 | 249 | 0.15 | 8 min |





