








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 320 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 85 matches | ||
| Faceit | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3677 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,545 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3513 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3924 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1718 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 2390 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,237,281 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 136 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪Iredarknlioness • | 63% | 41 |
| #2 | morfeuf | 59% | 71 |
| #3 | Mario | 59% | 61 |
| #4 | syscore | 58% | 48 |
| #5 | riAlicious | 58% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | FoX | 46% | 61 |
| #11 | Kumpe | 46% | 24 |
| #12 | joka | 45% | 47 |
| #13 | MANTO | 39% | 46 |
| #14 | Cr33KfR34k | 37% | 38 |





